wow

first off, i have to say thank you to some incredible people. i've been abundantly blessed by God and some other amazing people this weekend. to my family, jm, gus, bob, jeff, ryan, the schworms and everyone else (you know you are randy) i say thank you and i love you all. you made this past weekend so incredibly special for me and it touched me down in places of my soul that i hardly ever talk about. there were a lot of tears this weekend and a lot of laughs as well. being able to lead worship on sunday at my current church e3 made it all that much more special. words can't even begin to recap everything but in a rare moment i'm going to type up what i wrote on my journal friday night minutes after the graduation ceremony. to all of you, once again i love you and hope to see every single one of you soon......

well, it really happened. i graduated college. there are so many emotions flowing inside my body right now that it's hard for these words to do it justice. i'm sitting here at a sonic waiting on some food and a delicious cherry limeaid, alone. for a change that's not a bad thing. i hate being alone but right now i need to be. just me, my journal, and God.
i think back on the journey i've been on and it makes me feel how powerful, loving, and forgiving God is. this journey has left its share of scars but there have been so many wonderful moments filled with joy. there were times i never thought this moment would happen and ironically there were many times i didn't want it to happen. part of growing up has meant learning what the path is that has been laid out before me and it's taken me a lot longer than i could have ever imagined. why? well the truth is i still don't know what that path is. i just know God has brought me this far and He will show me where to go when the time is right.
i think back on times gone by, growing up as a little kid in alabama, being a lonely teenager who got in way over his head living in connecticut, to finding great friends in richmond, and lastly finding peace of mind in tallahassee. i feel loved and blessed by it all.
tonight when the president of fsu said congratulations to all of you, you are now alumni of florida state university my eyes welled up with tears which i quickly wiped away so the people next to me wouldn't think i was a complete dork. of all the things that i have happened this weekend i am most ashamed by that. after all that has happened, i should have been proud to shed those tears because it would have been an acknowledgment of all of this. all the pain, all the hurt, all the joy, all the people who helped me get here.
i realize now that i am one of the luckiest people alive. as i start this next chapter, who knows what it will bring.......to be continued....

april 25, 2008 (30 minutes after graduating florida state university)